I was asked a really random question today. "How do you feel, emotionally?" At first, I didn't know what to say. Many hours after I got home, this question was all I could think about.

Scared, worried, confused, and stressed beyong belief. I wouldnt doubt it if I had an anxiety attack one of these days. Seriously. =( I went to put some clothes in the dryer, and while I was down there I put the dryer on high sound (not sure why thats even an option) and I bawled my eyes out. I havent needed the dryer to cover up my feeling for a long time. Im truly upset, and feel like ive given up on much more then myself.

You see, I had a meeting with someone from the conference and together we called the WI senators office to see if there was a way to expedite my status. (won't mention to much, this will onnly make sence if you know) During this process I found that I only have 3 options that may or may not work for me.
Choice 1: Call the senators office
Choice 2: Lawyer
Choice 3: Go back to Australia

What I hadnt realized before, is that Im in more trouble then anybody could ever know. With the senators office, I got alot of information. I even got a list of great, hard working and efficient lawyers that they could recommend to help me. If I were to go back to Australia, there would be a 10 year bar and I wouldnt be able to come back and live here. =( yes, im freaked out. Did I mention 10 years? I would be 29 before I could see everyone agian.
I need to raise money for a layer, somehow...maybe...*sigh*

Theres also a small chance, but a chance in anything that since im still labeled a "child" till im 21, that my mum could claim me as a family immagrant, IF she gets her permanant residency changed to American citizenship. But this all has to happen really fast. There are still no garentees that any of this will work, but I have hope...for now. If this is a NO, then I give up for good. I also need to get approximately $675 to help my mum pay for her Citizenship paperwork.


Theres more to this, but Im stressing just writing about how I feel. Anyway, I need prayers for all this. Its a hard time and friends make it better. =D